Volume I, Issue II: Extras

The Essence of the Sun

October 9, 2017

By: Nicolas R. Brunstein, Staff Writer

How I Love The Sunshine

And Its Beautiful Warmth

Come Out With Me And Play

How I Love The Sunshine

Feel The Heat On My Skin

No Sun, Don’t Go Away

How I Love The Sunshine

It’s Getting Much Hotter

Oh Boy, What Can I Say

How I Love The Sunshine

The Sun Scorching Me

The Heat Hunts Me Like Prey

How I Love The Sunshine

I Think I’m Going Blind

Death Is Coming My Way

Flesh Continues To Rot

Devil’s Hand At My Feet

To Hell I Go Today

Obituaries

October 10, 2017

Melvin died October 7, 2017 after living a long life as the favorite pet of Little Jimmy Jones. His life consisted primarily of eating small fish and sunbathing, what better life could he ask for. Melvin was buried in the backyard alongside the past pet turtles.

CLASSIFIEDS

October 10, 2017

FAKE ID’S SOLD HERE

Come To Room 202

Get Hooked Up With A Fake

As Low As $50

BRING CASH ONLY!!!

PARTY ROOM 211

Next Thursday, October 19th, room 211 is hosting a party at 11pm, and has invited all ‘02s. Special beverages will be available.

Single, cisgendered, white male still seeks small, flightless bird, for a committed relationship. Still enjoys “masterpiece theatre,” long walks on the beach, and jello baths. Contact at (563) 349-6203.

FOR SALE: One slightly used ottoman. See Ms. Lemire in 205 for details. Will trade for meal swipes, or somewhere around $25.

THE FUNNIES: